Pain grinds at me like iron,
Wears me down like stone,
Chips at me like flint,
Stabs and burns and tears at me
Like a team of demented inquisitors
Intent on getting me to admit
I do love Big Brother.

And the doublethink
Is knowing all too well
What it grinds and flakes and wears away is me,
My own soft self, my life, my hours,
While not allowing me to think I could have been
Better or (worse) worse, different,
Without the constant drone of pain.

The match of the day is Pain V Fun,
Pain V Productivity, Pain V me being there.
These stairs now, or stuck in bed tomorrow?
Fit to work later, or going straight home now?
Standing up to cook, or being able to walk after?
Pain’s constant unpleasant calculus.
Sometimes I regret sensible choices.

In Tivoli the Pegasus fountain
Marks the accessible path
Pegasus means there is a way
A ramp, an elevator, the will to do it,
Retrofitting, fitting, making the calculations easy,
What I need is Pegasus.
A flying horse can take me anywhere.

24th November 2022, Rome